Tolerance

Complaining about people is natural, I guess. I used to be this way and sometimes revert to the behavior. But upon turning 32, I've met a classmate, "J" who complains about others a bit more than normal, but I get along with him and another girl at our lab table well. I forgive him for his complaints, after all, he's only in his mid-twenties (weg). We have a noisy, obnoxious classmate whom, even from all the way across the room, just irritates the snot out of J. Once, I made a comment that the irritating classmate was "interesting." J laughed and told me I was always just so nice and diplomatic, even when describing someone who is clearly annoying. I told him, "well, he is somebody's son and since I have sons, I think about it before I put a label on him."

When I tell the DH about an aspect of someone's personality that is confusing me or disappointing me, he immediately labels the person and I immediately feel as though I have betrayed such person by mentioning he or she to DH at all! It makes me wonder, not that I have any control over this, what people think of me? I certainly say a lot of "dumb" things and present myself in an unflattering light. If everyone does not allow the same sort of personality forgiveness as I do, then how do they make friends (more than I have, presumably) and how do they see the good in the world as a whole?

Too much for now to consider. In any case, I took J's comment to me as a great compliment. It's nice to be known for being forgiving of other's superficial faults. If only everyone around me were so gracious.